My Why

life I guess I am one of the lucky ones. My early childhood years were quite happy, then when I turned six, my life changed. My father left the family, and my mother had a nervous breakdown which included an attempt to suicide. There was no help back then for people going through that situation. My mother was left to cope alone, without any support from the medical profession and no real family support. She coped the best that she could with a young daughter.

HOPE
My life spiralled out of control as I was abused physically, emotionally and then sexually, by different people in my life. Food was a rare commodity, so I found myself eating out of school rubbish bins to survive. The sexual abuse I endured took its toll on my young body, leaving me with appalling issues that would affect my future.

LOVE
I was a school truant, preferring to hang around the streets where I felt a sense of belonging. My wake-up moment came at age 12. I found myself expelled from school and placed into a Magdalene Asylum Laundry Convent where I stayed until I was 16 years old.

TRUST
At 16, the convent closed, and I found myself on the street and pregnant. Because of my low self-esteem, I ended up in a domestically violent relationship.There was no escape; he was an alcoholic, and I found out later that my husband also had psychiatric conditions. I had two children before the age of 18 and shortly after, at age 21, I left him, leaving my children behind. If I had stayed, he would have killed me.

FAITH
At the age of 23, after being involved in a shocking and deadly accident on a highway with two semi-trailers. I sat in my hospital bed for six months and realised that I had to turn my life around. I did not like where I was heading; there was no hope for that path. I made the first of some truly sensible decisions at that time. It was hard to head down a different path, but determination and necessity saw me attempt to do it.

BELIEF
I would like to say that I had a light bulb moment. I did not. I did, for want of better words, miraculously learn something that changed my life. The accident affected me; it allowed me to take stock and see new challenges ahead of me. I could see that the path I was on, no longer served me. Changes were required, and my changes were all extremely specific and difficult to carry out. Each change meant altering who I was at my core, or whom I believed I was, my essence. Each alteration had to be absolute, because once the adjustment was made, I never wanted to go back.

DESIRE
I am happy to say that, after many years, I have made enough changes to ensure that I am living a truly fulfilled and happy life. I have a loving husband and beautiful family. They drive me. Don’t get me wrong I still have issues, but they are a work in progress. If I said, I no longer had any problems I would not be facing my reality. Everyone has issues. My issues now are relatively standard ones, every day coping issues rolled up with some baggage from the past, but we all have our skeletons.

hearts

PROMISE
That is “My Why”, I have unquestionably been there and done that. That is why I consider myself to be one of the lucky ones. I survived and then thrived. It is never too late to make changes in your life. It is no point looking back and crying for what wasn’t. Yesterday is gone, and every moment we spend looking back, we miss out on spending those moments happy in the here and now.

So, who am I? I am a person who can speak from experience.

What is my dream?

My dream is to inspire and encourage you who have experienced trauma to find the courage to release your deepest anxieties. I want to help you to move forward and not only survive, but to grow and meet your full potential.

How do I intend to do that?

First and foremost, by being your sounding board. Then, by sharing hints and tips through my blog and Facebook that have worked for me. I have been in the personal development industry for about twelve years as a trainer and a certified NLP Master Practitioner, Life Coach.

Feel free to interact with me through my blog, website, Facebook or any other social media outlet, I am quick to respond and love to hear what you have to say. It helps me to learn also.

Thank you for taking the time to read why I have chosen to do this.

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